There will be blood. Ace of Spades meets House of Hollow in this villain origin story. Laure Mesny is a perfectionist with an axe to grind. Despite being constantly overlooked in the elite and cutthroat world of the Parisian ballet, she will do anything to prove that a Black girl can take center stage. To level the playing field, Laure ventures deep into the depths of the Catacombs and strikes a deal with a pulsating river of blood. The primordial power Laure gains promises influence and adoration, everything she's ...
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There will be blood. Ace of Spades meets House of Hollow in this villain origin story. Laure Mesny is a perfectionist with an axe to grind. Despite being constantly overlooked in the elite and cutthroat world of the Parisian ballet, she will do anything to prove that a Black girl can take center stage. To level the playing field, Laure ventures deep into the depths of the Catacombs and strikes a deal with a pulsating river of blood. The primordial power Laure gains promises influence and adoration, everything she's dreamed of and worked toward. With retribution on her mind, she surpasses her bitter and privileged peers, leaving broken bodies behind her on her climb to stardom. But even as undeniable as she is, Laure is not the only monster around. And her vicious desires make her a perfect target for slaughter. As she descends into madness and the mystifying underworld beneath her, she is faced with the ultimate choice: continue to break herself for scraps of validation or succumb to the darkness that wants her exactly as she is-monstrous heart and all. That is, if the god-killer doesn't catch her first. From debut author Jamison Shea comes I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me, a twisted dark fantasy that lifts a veil on the institutions that profit on exclusion and the toll of giving everything to a world that will never love you back.
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I am so torn about this book. I wanted to love it, I loved the concept, the ballet, and the characters. But I kept finding myself not wanting to pick it up and struggling to continue. I did inevitably continue as I did want to know what happened, but I did struggle to do so.
I don't know if it was the plot or the writing, but there was just something missing for me to want to continue to pick it up without putting it down. But I did still have a connection to the story. While I will not be continuing the series, I do think that this was a good book and could see how someone other than me might enjoy it more.
Overall I wonder if it had been written at a more adult instead of young adult level if I would have liked it more. I do know that horror is not my genre, however I do love a good story with demons and I love ballet. I continue to ponder why I did not fall in love with it as much as I anticipated that I should have.
Abigail
Aug 14, 2023
A Fairytale for the Dark Souls
ââ?¬Å"What do you crave?ââ?¬Â?
ââ?¬Å"And what would you give for power?ââ?¬Â?
(Possible spoilers, read at your own risk)
Laure Mesny has ambition in her blood. It's not enough that she was trained by the Paris Ballet if she can't also join the company, not enough still if she can't be the star.
She will do whatever it takes; longer practices, broken nails, humiliation and thanklessly pouring everything she has into dance. She is perfect, but that isn't enough in a world of privilege, prejudice and nepotism. It's can never be enough, when acceptance is dependant on money and skin colour.
But none of that has to matter, because Laure is willing to do what it takes, give what it takes.
Even if what it takes is blood.
How lucky that she has finally found someone who will accept her sacrifice, and reward it. Someone, or something.
It doesn't matter. All that matters is that she has power.
Wow. I Feed Her to the Beast is one exhilarating ride, I honestly couldn't put it down. Laure Mesny is the flawed MC I have been dying to meet for a long time. I had high expectations for this book when I picked it up, and it met so many of them head on.
Firstly, can we talk about the setting? I have been obsessed with Paris since I was a small child reading Madeline books, on into my teenage years with Les Miserables and of course, The Phantom of the Opera. I was thrilled when I realised this story was going to take place in the Palais Garnier, and even more thrilled as I read the descriptions and story itself. The atmosphere of the story was a strong enough reference to Phantom, and I was glad that there weren't too many parallels other than the location and the feel of the story.
The Paris catacombs too have captured my imagination in the past, as they have come into various books and films over the years. What a wonderful setting for a book, this perfect gilded city sitting atop a rabbit-warren of tunnels and caverns literally filled with the dead. Paris is still one of my favourite places, so full of history both dark and beautiful.
When you think of the deal-with-the-devil trope, what comes to mind? For me the immediate thought is ââ?¬Å"be careful what you wish forââ?¬Â?. It's monkey's paws, in-over-your-head, everything comes with a price. Of course, I mean those things are synonymous with devil deals, aren't they? Well, they no longer have to be. I was waiting for the tired old penny to drop, for the moment to come when Laure realises that she has given everything for nothing and now she is damned. But Jamison Shea saw me coming, and I want to hug them for that.
This is a different kind of story. It's not one where ââ?¬Å"Good must defeat Evilââ?¬Â? because maybe, just maybe, people are more complex than that? It's a story that acknowledges that monsters come in all forms, and not everything that looks monstrous, or even is monstrous, is evil. Sometimes, the darkness doesn't need casting out, sometimes it just needs to be embraced.
I will always love a classic fairytale where the 'good people' live happily ever after and the 'baddies' get defeated, okay? But also, it is beyond refreshing to read a story for the flaws in us, for our fear ridden power-hungry selves. A story that acknowledges that we all have something vicious inside of us, and that's okay.
Laure isn't a protagonist, and she certainly isn't the villain. She is just herself- powerful, angry, and ready to be given the chance that she has rightfully earned, even if she has to take it by force. Although I don't relate to her particular level of ambition, I found that I loved her and felt a certain kinship for her. I think a lot of people will find themselves reflected in Laure, the ones who have inner darkness that isn't supposed to be acknowledged, who always hide their dark imagination from the people around them, afraid there is something wrong with them.
I know that another trope which is fairly tired at this point is that the 'true monsters' are society and expectations, etc, but honestly Shea does this so well that I can't even be mad. I was so angry at the attitudes and oversights of the ballet company, that it was somehow easy to feel that they were the true villains, rather than the more obvious ancient eldritch god.
How is that possible, how have I finished reading a book about a blood sacrifice to an ancient deity who manifests in the form of a river of blood, and come out feeling like, nope, Acheron isn't the villain. What? It makes no sense, in the best way possible.
I think the only other time I have read a story this backwards from usual in terms of how you feel towards the devil character (aside from absurd comedies like Good Omens) is Sylvia Townsend Warner's book Lolly Willowes. Its a gentle classic with the bizarre and unexpected twist involving a somehow lovely little deal with the devil. I want to put these two books on the shelf next to each other. Two other stories which this one evokes are Addie LaRue and Black Swan (of course), and some films I've seen recently which also channel the obsessive devotion and intensity of the Paris Ballet are The Perfection, and Nocturne (Blumhouse). Both of these are music stories rather than dance, but the vibe is so similar.
When reading that opening line I also can't help thinking ââ?¬Å"Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?ââ?¬Â?.
If you know, you know.
Also, if you loved the claustrophobic creepiness of the Paris catacombs, I would like to recommend a film which takes place there - As Above So Below, thought it is not for the faint of heart.
I wouldn't recommend this book to everyone, but if you like the sound of it, you are going to love it. If you are ready to see the odd one out take back her own, if you are tired of darkness being synonymized with evil, if you are looking for an unapologetic and fierce main character, then this book is for you.
It was real privilege to read this book pre-publication, thank you to Reader's First.
